“Let’s move in together to test how our marriage would work someday.”
Does that line scare you?
Well, for some people, it does not simply because they themselves want to live with their partners before marriage. They want to know what life is like having to live with the person you love and instead of going right into marriage, they would rather cohabit.
Cohabitation is specifically an act of living together devoid of being married to each other. Often young couples would tend to live in together and share their lives each day without resorting to marriage.
So, why do people live in together before marriage?
For some couples, living in together is a form of a rehearsal on what it’s like for their married life someday. They would rather discover first the idea of knowing your partner each day by living with him or her and learning his or her personality, behavior and everyday actions. In addition, these couples would rush into living with each other for sharing purposes. They can both share all the expenses inside their own house and risk the idea of living alone.
Another reason and I think the most common reason is fear of commitment. If you want to live together why not get marry instead? These people do not want to get married because they fear commitment. They are afraid that if they get married, they will be filled with much responsibility and cannot get away.
Is cohabitation healthy?
When we look at the different aspects involving cohabitation, we would definitely say that it is not healthy for a couple to live in together before marriage. The Bible would strongly point that cohabitation is a form of premarital act. No man or woman must live with the opposite sex unless bounded by the vows of marriage. If in case a couple would consider cohabitation first before marriage, certain consequences like divorce would most likely be experienced.
So, what are the consequences of living together before marriage?
Many experts attest to the fact that living together before marriage has a higher divorce rate than those married couples living together. Since the mindset of these unmarried couples is based on testing or trial for marriage, they would likely give up if they cannot conform to their partner. Simply saying that since they are not bounded by marriage, they can freely separate.
In addition, cohabitation will also result in lower commitment to the partner. It is like saying that you can still go on and flirt with other women because you are not committed to your partner. Also, relationships become too unstable. Unlike getting married, cohabitation will lead you nowhere. Will you be able to get married someday or not? Will I have children or will I still have another man to whom I will be married? Since your relationship is not sealed with the vows of marriage, both of you will still think openly to other possibilities like having another partner in the future.
Bottom line: Living together before marriage is a practice of two people afraid of responsibility and commitment. They want to play safe by involving with each other seriously but opening themselves to other possibilities devoid of their partner. This is simply not a healthy situation for a relationship. No one can rehearse their married life or even know what married life is without getting married. Marriage is more on the emotion bond and commitment of the couple rather than the act of living together.
To know the Bible viewpoint of living together before marriage, watch this video: